When is too much too much? When do you throw in the towel? Am I being selfish for thinking ‘why don’t you just bundle all this **** and dump it at someone else’s door…not that I wish anyone that much misfortune…
Just indulge me this little intermezzo in self-pity and I’ll be back to my usual smiling and ‘taking it one day at the time’ soon!
Somewhere on this blog you could already read about my health issues…I’m a chronic backpain patient due to severe scoliosis.Crash and reboot, the chronic back pain tales and Don’t you breakdown… I have chronic pains, radiating pains to legs, neck and head and what I call my random pain attacks…the worst…that’s pain on three levels only from one condition and with all this my ‘backpack: this is life, deal with it’ is pretty much full as it is. I know backpacks have those little side pockets and are super flexible…but there’s a weight limit right?!
Three years ago I got tinnitus, not exactly a fun gift, I can assure you, as it affects my sleep a lot, but hey, there are worse things. Two years ago they discovered I had a leaking heart valve. Then last year, and still ongoing, a thyroid condition and nodule came in the picture and since last week there’s a new kid in town: a balance disorder. Had been light-headed for a while but since a few days now I can’t go outside without getting dizzy, nauseous, loosing balance and feeling very insecure. My eyes don’t follow my own movements or environmental movements as rapidly which makes it hard to focus and very exhausting. Even typing gives me headache as the eyes moving from the keyboard to the page gives a blurry and delayed sensation. The London and Malta posts will come with some delays because of this, bare with me…
Already consulted a doctor and there is indeed a disorder on one side of the balance system…however, more tests needed to find out by what it is caused and exactly which part is affected…in the meantime…it’s an unbalanced life and trying to stay on my feet, literally…oh and trying to find ways to pimp that backpack too😉
Feel free to send me some happy vibes!
One thought on “An unbalanced life…”
Entropy always wins in the end, which is something that I appreciate more and more as I steadily get older. Meanwhile stay strong, mentally at least, (your writing clearly says this is the case) and enjoy and treasure what you have had and still have. I don’t know if these words are appropriate but they are the ones that come to me and I feel some response is due to your heartfelt words.